Birmingham Telecommunications News 1993

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Volume 6, Issue 11 Issue #64 December 1993

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

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article title author

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Disclaimer/Statement of Policy.............................Staff

*Party Announcement!*................................Mark Maisel

From The Editor.................................Scott Hollifield

Submission Guidelines...........................................

Letters to BTN.......................................BTN Readers

First Annual BTN Art Contest...............................Rules

Editorial..........................................Dean Costello

The Last Hegemony, Part 3.....................Christopher Mohney

"Dear Jan"...........................................Jeff Vaughn

Games Children Play..................................Damion Furi

Life on the Lines..............................Bernie Starchaser

Cafe Spotlight: G.G.'s In The Park....................David Moss

Local Music in December.............................Judy Ranelli

Notes From The Trenches............................Dean Costello

BTN ProFile: Bernie Starchaser........................The Bishop

Special Interest Groups (SIGs).........................Eric Hunt

Known BBS Numbers...................................James Minton

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DISCLAIMER

AND STATEMENT OF POLICY

FOR BTN

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We at BTN try our best to assure the accuracy of articles and

information in our publication. We assume no responsibility for damage

due to errors, omissions, etc. The liability, if any for BTN, its

*editors and writers, for damages relating to any errors or omissions,

etc., shall be limited to the cost of a one year subscription to BTN,

even if BTN, its editors or writers have been advised of the likelihood

of such damages occurring.

With the conclusion of that nasty business, we can get on with our

policy for publication and reproduction of BTN articles. We publish

monthly with a deadline of the fifteenth of the month prior to

publication. If you wish to submit an article, you may do so at any time

but bear in mind the deadline if you wish for your work to appear in a

particular issue. It is not our purpose to slander or otherwise harm a

person or reputation and we accept no responsibility for the content of

the articles prepared by our writers. Our writers own their work and it

is protected by copyright. We allow reprinting of articles from BTN

with only a few restrictions. The author may object to a reprint, in

which case he will specify in the content of his article. Otherwise,

please feel free to reproduce any article from BTN as long as the

source, BTN, is specified, and as long as the author's name and the

article's original title are retained. If you use one of our articles,

please forward a copy of your publication to:

Mark Maisel

Publisher, BTN

606 Twin Branch Terrace

Birmingham, AL 35216

(205) 823-3956

We thank you for taking the time to read our offering and we hope that

you like it. We also reserve the right to have a good time while doing

all of this and not get too serious about it.

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FREEBIE!!!

GET IT WHILE IT'S HOT! Systems That Offer Free BTN

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The following boards allow BTN to be downloaded freely, that is

with no charge to any existing upload/download ratios.

ADAnet One Alter-Ego Bone Yard

Bus System The Castle Channel 8250

C.A.B. The Comfy Chair! Crunchy Frog

DC Info Exchange Final Frontier The Guardian

Hardware Hotline Homewood's Hell Hole Joker's Castle

Leaping's Lounge Lemon Grove Lion's Den

Martyrdom Again?! The MATRIX Milliways BBS

The Outer Limits Owl's Nest Playground

Safe Harbor Southern Stallion Starbase 12

Thy Master's Dungeon Weekends BBS

(This list includes some systems which are not local to Birmingham and

therefore not included on our BBS Numbers list.)

If you are a sysop and you allow BTN to be downloaded freely, please let

me know via The Matrix or Crunchy Frog so that I can post your board as

a free BTN distributor. Thanks.

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NEWSFLASH!

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ANNOUNCING BY POPULAR DEMAND!!

THE ***RETURN***

OF THE

---===***>>> BTN PARTY <<<***===---

!!!!!!!

Date: Saturday, Dec. 4, 1993

Time: 6:00 p.m.

Place: Home of Mark and Kathy Maisel

606 Twin Branch Terrace, Vestavia

What: BTN Party

If you need further directions, please call (205)-823-3956. If you

reach the answering service, do leave a message. Your call will be

returned, provided you leave a valid phone number in the message.

We will probably have some snack foods on hand and soft drinks. If you

have a preference as to food, then be sure to bring it. If you are of

legal age, you will be expected to bring your own alcoholic beverage,

should you desire them. If you are not, then don't bring any as you will

be asked to leave. Do not bring any illegal substances or items or you

will also be asked to leave. The Vestavia Police are not known to be as

forgiving as have been the Birmingham Police.

This party has a very special purpose. It has come to my attention that

many of you would like to write for BTN. The staff and I will be on

hand to help you with the complicated procedures surrouding the

submission and publication of your articles, reviews, and editorial

commentaries. We know that you've always wanted a chance and now you

will have it.

A primitive map follows.

MM, Pub

The easiest route is to get on Columbiana Road via either US HWY 31 or I-65N

exit to Vestavia/Hoover. Proceed up Columbiana to Tyler Road. Take Tyler

Road to Twin Branch Drive. Take the left fork to Twin Branch Terrace. Our

House is the next to last on the right side of the street. The "X"'s mark

the location. The asterisks refer to traffic lights. The first is at the

I-65N exit and goes directly onto Columbiana. The second is Columbiana³ ³

and Tyler. The third is Hackberry/Southland and Tyler. ³ US ³

³ HWY³

This map is not drawn to scale! ³ 31 ³

¿ ¿Columbiana ³ ³

HackberryÀ¿ \ \ À¿Road ³ ³

Lane À¿ \ I-65 \ À¿ ³ ³

À¿ \ \ À¿ ³ ³

__________Tyler Road____________________*3_______\_________\*2 ³ ³

³ ³ ³ ³ \ ¿\ ³ ³

³Twin Branch ³Donna ³Paden À¿ \ À¿ \ ³ ³

³Drive ³Drive ³Drive À¿Southland \ À¿ \ ³ ³

³ ³ ³ À¿Drive \ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ\ *1 ³

³ ÀÄÄÄÄÄ¿ \ \ ³

³ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ\ÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ \

ÚÄÄÁ¿ \ ³ ³ \

ÚÙ ³Twin Branch \³\ ³

ÚÙ 606³Terrace ³ \³

³ XX³<--- ³ ³

Á_____Á__________________Swiss Lane_____ ³ ³

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FROM

THE EDITOR Scott Hollifield

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You know, I've never gone in for that "summer equals birth, winter

equals death" stuff.

It makes for some pretty poetry, but it's not really accurate unless

you're a plant. Our own calendar may end with the onset of winter, but

it begins with it too. If things die at the approach of night and

winter, then why are winter nights my favorite? I'm certainly no fan of

death... quite the contrary. Seeing things in winter is like putting on

a new pair of glasses. It's feeling cold when our senses are the

sharpest. And the biggest birthday celebration of the largest religion

in America takes place in December, a holiday which I am always pleased

to celebrate for my own reasons.

It's with that mood in mind that I am also pleased to present a

slightly reborn BTN.

You've probably already noticed the cosmetic changes, but there are

other changes beneath the surface which are busy at work, like Santa's

elves.

We're expanding our staff to provide a wider base of interest.

We've re-thought out a lot of things that make BTN tick, and in the

months ahead, you can be sure that we'll be tinkering with them a bit.

Plus, we're reinforcing our commitment to make sure there's a BTN in

every stocking; in compiling our Known BBS Numbers, we're making the

list and checking it twice, so to speak.

In short, better service, more substance.

By example, this month you'll see a brand-new set of submission

guidelines in case you're interested in writing for BTN but don't know

how. It's easy, it's free, it's sexy.

We're also finally kicking off our First Annual BTN Art Contest,

whispered about for months now, and I hope we see some responses to

that.

That's it! This is short because we're impatient to get things

moving. Happy non-death-time, and I hope to see you at the party!

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SUBMISSION GUIDELINES

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I. ARTICLE LENGTH

Right now, there's no strict enforcement of a length restriction,

but if your submission is somewhat short, I may request that you make it

longer. Anyone can sit down and type out a screen's worth of stuff. I

have yet to encounter an article that was too *long*, so don't worry

about that.

II. SUBJECT MATTER

Again, there's no hard-and-fast rules about subject matter. I'm

interested in seeing material on a wide variety of topics. That

includes BBSs, politics, music, books, or better yet, something that

doesn't neatly fall into any one category. Next to that, my favorite

articles are the ones that have something to do with BBSing, since that

is supposedly what we're sort of about. Technical reviews are also

good. I tend to kind of frown on fiction, but I'm willing to take a

look at anything you've got. If it's interesting enough, your chances

are good.

Politics is fine, but try not to rant--and make whatever you have to

say original. I can go out and find ten Rush Limbaughs if I want.

Also refrain from "This Is What Happened To Me Today" slice-of-life

articles unless it's leading somewhere good.

Reviews should be both informative and opinionated. Don't be too

objective, but still tell us about what you're reviewing.

III. FILE FORMAT

Plain and simple ASCII is preferred, but we can convert WordPerfect

files if need be.

IV. STYLE GUIDELINES

1. Use a right margin of 72 columns.

2. Indent paragraphs at the fifth column.

3. Put two spaces after each sentence.

4. Skip a line after each paragraph.

5. Refrain from using BBS-specific devices like "<grin>" and ":-)".

6. Be sure to give your article a title.

7. Try to use correct grammar, spelling and capitalization! My staff

proofread as best as we can, but a well-typed article makes our job

easier.

8. The dash is correctly typed as two hyphens, like "--". Use it to

set apart phrases and clauses--as with this sentence.

9. To emphasize a word, place a pair of asterisks around it, like

*this*. This takes the place of italics (except for titles; see

12).

10. If you have to emphasize a group of words, use capitals, AS IN THIS

EXAMPLE. I generally don't like the way that looks, so use it

sparingly, if at all.

11. If you're unsure whether to spell out a number or not, leave it in

numeral form.

12. Titles of books, films, plays, albums and works of art are

surrounded by underlines, like: U2's _The Joshua Tree_. This takes

the place of italics in this regard; I call it "title-cizing".

On the other hand, television shows, songs, poems, article titles

and short stories are surrounded by quotation marks.

V. HOW DO I SUBMIT AN ARTICLE?

The easiest way is to upload it as a private file on one of two

systems: The Matrix and the Crunchy Frog. (Their phone numbers are

listed at the end of this feature.) To upload a file privately, begin

your file description with a slash ("/"). Then leave me (SCOTT

HOLLIFIELD) a private message telling me what the file name is, so that

I can have the sysop make it available for me.

Another way is to leave me the article as a private message, or a

series of private messages.

If you become a regular contributor to BTN, you can get access to

the private BTNWA conference, which is for BTN writers. There we

discuss articles, policy, ideas, etc. The BTNWA conference also

contains a private file directory which I can access more easily than a

private file outside BTNWA.

That's it!

Get to work!

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LETTERS TO

THE EDITOR From BTN Readers

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From: DAVID LARUSSA

BBS: The Matrix

Dear BTN,

I am slowly becoming a regular reader of your newsletter. I would

like to say how much I have enjoyed it, and admire the dedication of the

guys behind it. This newsletter is an important part of the BBS

community, or should I say BBS culture. It gives this virtual world

some badly needed solidity.

Here are some suggestions for articles:

I like the interviews with people. How about interviewing the sysops

of some boards. I know you guys have probably heard each other's

stories, but I would like to hear them too.

Please! No more political commentary. It's boring and in no way

could it be labeled as telecommunication news. The world needs no more

Rush Limbaugh clones.

How about some articles on hardware and software? The possibilities

here are endless.

Experiences people have had are also enjoyable to read.

What is it like being young, old, female, or handicapped? I am sure

these people have a unique perspective to share. I would like to hear

it.

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FROM: Rocky Rawlins

BBS: The Matrix

[NOTE: Rocky is the sysop of The Matrix. This letter was written in

response to issue #62's "The Last Hegemony (Part 2)" by Christopher

Mohney.]

Chris, while I know your article was tongue-in-cheek, I felt I

should reply to it to over this particular issue. This issue is one

that I had always felt rather strongly about.

First, let me clear up one point that many people already know but a

good number of new folks may not. The MATRIX (like most BBS's) has run

at a net operating loss every year since its inception. Last year our

corporate tax return showed a $7000 net operating loss. Despite the

well-known myth that all sysops make lots of money by running a BBS, the

average salary for Birmingham sysops is about -$.50/hour. Our recent

rather controversial rate increase was done in an attempt to provide

funding for the many new and expensive services that people want.

Now to my primary concern. The entire issue of censorship,

community standards, adult contents of messages and files is or should

be of concern to every single individual who operates or uses a BBS,

online system, or any other type of electronic communications.

The principles of privacy and freedom of speech are firmly rooted

in the constitution of the United States, and have been upheld from the

lowest courts all the way up to the Supreme Court of the United States.

These protections are extended to telephone conversations, postal mail,

and just about every form of communications. The Electronic Communi-

cations Act of 1992 seems to extend these same protections to *all*

electronic communications. *However*, many states feel free to

interpret the definition of "electronic communications" in different

ways. Even the federal government seems to have problems deciding

exactly what they are.

The incident with Steve Jackson Games where the Secret Service

seized the BBS and computer network at a games publisher is a good case

in point. The BBS was seized because of alleged criminal activity by

one of its users. A warrant was issued to seize it to capture the

evidence, and the Secret Service in a dawn raid did exactly that,

seizing the entire computer network at the company including all of

their publishing projects. What ultimately came out in court during

Steve Jackson's lawsuit against the Secret Service was that the Secret

Service did *not* have warrants to seize the electronic communications

of the hundreds of *outher* users on the system, which they not only

seized by physically removing the system, but spent weeks looking

through for possible criminal activity in violation of search and

seizure laws. They were also prohibited by federal law from seizing

"works in progress" from a publisher. That is one of the oldest

principles of law in the United States. But because the Secret Service

decided not to view electronic media as "real" works, they simply

ignored one of the oldest principles of United States law protecting

freedom of the press. When these facts were brought out in court

during the trial, the judge lost his temper and actually yelled at the

Secret Service defense attorneys in outrage at their actions. And these

are some of the people tasked with enforcing federal law. (By the way,

the Secret Service lost the case and paid damages not only to Steve

Jackson Games but to the individuals whose messages were seized.)

In the state of Alabama, we have the *only* attorney general in the

United States who has attempted to (and succeeded) in banning satellite

broadcasts of which he did not approve. This is unprecedented in the

history of this country to my knowledge, and to me, it says that this

man puts his personal political ambitions and prejudices ahead of

technological advancement in this state. Whatever you may think of the

Playboy Channel, when you abrogate *your* right to make choices to

someone like Jimmy Evans, you have willingly given up your right to

free speech.

The issue of freedom of speech in the electronic world is still a

new one and many people as well as many of the courts have not made up

their mind about the issues involved. Does an electronic message enjoy

the same legal status as a postal letter? Is it *still* a protected

communication if it is public? Is it still protected *after* you have

read it and it is sitting here on your drive? If you embed a file in

your message, is the file protected like the words you type? If you

send an illegal message who is responsible for it? You, us, anyone who

reads it, every system it passes through? If you send a message that is

legal in *our* state but is illegal in Georgia, who broke the law? You,

us, the systems it passed through, the system holding the message at

destination?

These are just a few of the issues that have yet to be resolved

with some definitive ruling.

If someone decides that *we* are responsible for the content of

messages that pass through our system, then that means that we

personally would have to read and approve every message you leave. Do

you really want us reading and passing judgement on your personal and

business messages like Prodigy does? Who in their right mind would use

electronic communications for business or really personal communications

knowing that someone else was censoring their messages? Would you use

the telephone if you knew that an operator was always monitoring your

conversations or the mail if you knew every letter would be opened and

read before delivery?

The local TV stations make a big deal out of dirty pictures and

sexual matters but the issue doesn't change. When was the last time the

phone company was attacked because people use it for obscene phone

calls? In an obscene phone call, an individual is misusing a technology

but does that lead to a condemnation of the technology and telephone

operators? Does obscene material sent through the mail result in an

attack on postal employees and the postal system? Of course not. The

idea is ludicrous. Yet similar misuse of BBS technology leads to an open

global condemnation of BBS and the people who operate them.

We have been trying for a year to get some kind of definitive

ruling from the Alabama attorney general or the district attorney on

some of these issues and have met a complete stone wall.

The ironic thing (and what bothers me about your article) is that

it is not *our* problem. It is *your* problem, Chris, yours and

everyone else who uses a BBS.

*You'll* be the loser Chris. *You* will no longer be able to

communicate privately electronically. *You* will have your articles

subject to seizure and prior restraint because electronic publishing is

not "real" publishing. *You're* the one who will suddenly be limited to

using Compuserve with its sky-high prices and department of lawyers to

defend themselves from people like Jimmy Evans. And if Jimmy Evans

should act against them and win in court as he did against a satellite

company, then Compuserve would simply cut off service to Alabama. No

skin off their nose.

Chris, I don't think you realize or fully understand the issues at

stake here. Georgia, in response to similar TV stories there, passed

state laws that make it a felony to discuss, distribute, or even mention

the issue of sexual matters on *any* type off electronic communications.

Any message that you send to a BBS in Georgia that refers to sexual

matters is now a felony. If you respond on The MATRIX to a message from

someone in Georgia asking where they can find Adult discussion

conferences Chris, *you* have committed a Felony under Georgia state law

and could conceiveably be arrested and prosecuted if you entered the

state of Georgia, or even extradited from Alabama to Georgia to face

trial there. Farfetched you say? The laws provide the mechanisms; and

remember who the Attorney General of Alabama is?

I'm not particularly worried about the existance of The MATRIX in

the long run. If the courts (or Jimmy Evans) decides that *we* are

responsible for the content of *every* message that appears on or passes

through The MATRIX, then we'll simply close the system down (as would

most BBS operators), refund any outstanding subscriptions, and I'll

spend all my sudden free time and spare cash building a wood shop in the

basement, and I'll do my private communications by legally protected

telephone or postal mail.

Frankly Chris I've become rather discouraged over the response in

the BBS user community to this issue. Of over four thousand users on

The MATRIX, and who knows how many more users on other BBS's, about one

hundred showed up to protest at Channel 13. Is the community really

that unconcerned with the issue? Is it just that people don't give a

damn and are willing to let someone like Jimmy Evans and Channel 13 make

their decisions for them? Sometimes it appears so.

Once upon a time I worked for causes. I picketed, I protested, I

*fought* for what I believed in. Maybe that's old fashioned and is out

of style. Maybe this generation doesn't believe in "principles"

anymore. I'm getting older now, and have a family that takes up much of

my time. I have a wife that I want to spend time with, kids that I want

know better before they move away. There are a lot of books I have

always wanted to read that I *intend* to read before I die, a lot of

things I haven't had time for that I intend to do.

I can raise issues, but I can't lead battles for them anymore. I'm

too old, worn out, and tired to be a knight in shining armor. These

days, wounds hurt more and take longer to heal. Worse is that no one

seems to care whether the battle is fought at all, much less who wins

it. That is the saddest thing of all.

Articles like yours that jokingly or seriously make these issues

out to be somthing that I and other BBS operators are concerned with at

the expense of users make me wonder whether to even bother. If *you're*

not concerned about the issue, why should I be? It's not *my* fight,

Chris. It's *yours*. If you don't care to fight it, I'm certainly not

going to force you. We've seriously considered here whether to just

delete any controversial material, since no one seems to much care about

the issue, and I can't see being a sacrificial lamb over an issue that

is of no importance to anyone.

Rocky

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FIRST ANNUAL

BTN ART

CONTEST Rules by Mark Maisel

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It is with great pleasure that I announce the First Annual BTN Art

Contest. It purpose is twofold. First, it provides an outlet for the

visually creative. Second, it provides a good advertisement for BTN.

We have come to realize that not everyone is familiar with BTN and

that some publicity may be due. To that end, an art contest in two

formats will be held. The common theme of the entries is to be BTN, its

promotion, etc. Art in standard ANSI and the new RIP graphics format

will be accepted.

Winners in the ANSI format and RIP format will be selected by a

panel of judges. The winning ads will be displayed in the news or other

prominent place on cooperating bbs' about town.

Rules (such as they are)

1. The contest is open to anyone who can use an ANSI or RIP editor to

create original graphic art.

2. Obscene or offensive graphics and text will be disallowed.

3. The discretion of the judges shall be final.

4. The winning submissions will become the property of BTN.

5. The contest will run from December 1, 1993 through January 14, 1994.

This is to allow both sufficient time for submissions and for BTN to

publish the winning submissions in the February 1994 issue.

6. For ANSI submissions, all viewable characters in the IBM character

set are allowed as is use of color. Submissions must be in 80 x 25

character text mode and not exceed 24 lines in length. This is to

insure that the submissions may be viewed in a single screen.

7. For RIP submissions, color graphics compatible with the RIP format

are accepted provided that they do not exceed a single screen when

displayed.

8. All artwork must be original and created by the person submitting

it. Cooperative efforts are allowed but all parties involved must

be named.

I wish you all the best of luck! Be creative and get those

submissions rolling in soon. Have us drowning in them!

[Ed.: Please send your submissions as a private upload, mentioning the

contest in the file description, to The Matrix or Crunchy Frog; or

send it as a private message to MARK MAISEL on either of those boards.]

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EDITORIAL:

BTN, Take... Three? Dean Costello

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Every so often I think about why I write. I mean, sometimes I get

feelings in my soul that say if I don't write, I will simply explode on

the spot, or at least throw a blood clot and lose control over such

bodily functions as drool containment.

But why do I write? Excitement, probably. You know: the magic, the

joy, the machismo, the chicks, the leather, but mostly the excitement.

I will be wandering through yet another airline terminal somewhere, and

I will notice Something Neat, begin to smile, and proceed to mentally

lash together a good article. Sometimes it will be the surly

individuals at the metal detectors. (I have wondered if the continuous

exposure to x-rays rots the medulla oblongata, since every one of those

little devils, be it Tri-City Airport in Tennessee, or Pensacola

Airport, or New Haven Airport, has the precise same expression; a mix of

frustration with one's lot in life, disdain for those that pass through

their portals, and the maniacal joy of being able to pick any one person

out of the crowd for pointless harassment; these emotions are all

controlled by the medulla oblongata, you know.) Sometimes it will be

that the rubber bands on the handrests of the escalators move a little

bit more slowly than the stairs. Sometimes it will be amazement on how

much food in airport costs.

The thing is, whenever I come up with one of these observations, I

am forced to tell someone. The problem occurs when I don't have anyone

or anything handy to tell it to, and the Somethings Neat start to back

up. As a result, when I haven't spoken to an individual in a while, I

usually conduct a 15-minute monologue to get up-to-date.

Events like this happened tonight. I was watching "60 Minutes", and

they were interviewing Dave Berry. I'm personally not a big fan, since

the magic of humor like "The Ten Father Commandments" is somewhat lost

on me. ("1. I am not a sitcom Dad. I am not stupid, and I always

remember to turn the gas stove off when the pilot light goes out. 2. If

my offspring is male, I will live vicariously through you. 3. If my

offspring is female, I will live vicariously through you. 4. If you

are pretty good at Little League when you are ten, I will buy you a car

when you are sixteen (see Commandments 2 and 3)", etc.)

Anyway, a couple of things that were said got me to thinking about

why I write, and I have narrowed it down to two things:

1. The excitement, chicks, leather, etc. as described above.

2. Icky things.

Icky things run the gamut from thinking about how the country is

spinning to the right so hard I've had a sore neck from political

whiplash, to thinking about my dead grandfather and how my brother has

turned in to a schmoe over the last couple of years.

I somewhat disregarded the second reason for writing for many years,

since it struck me as a silly and simplistic reason for writing. (Mark

Maisel once told me that the best writing I do is when I am disturbed or

upset. Unfortunately, that kind of writing is very emotionally taxing,

as well as sometimes, umm, "erratic" in quality.) But as I view the

reasons for writing tonight, and the last bunch of articles I've

written, he may have a point.

The thing is is that my life has been pretty much "normal" as of

late. When I say normal, I mean uneventful for the most part; no major

emotional traumas to speak of, a couple of reconciliations, one or two

separations; more or less maintaining an even strain. But over the last

couple of months, things seem to have gone downhill in a big, big hurry,

relatively speaking, thus generating a faint need to write, but the

impetus to write in this particular forum has been lacking.

To be frank, I didn't really want to be associated with BTN. For

whatever reason, when Scott Hollifield took over BTN about a year or so

ago, the perceived quality of the publication has gone to hell in a

fairly large handbasket. The people that were writing for BTN during

this time were by-and-large poor writers (I was debating using the word

"hack" to describe many writers, but the word "hacks" implies a basic

competence), with only the faintest grasp of the basic concepts of

grammar and/or lacking the fundamental ability to get information across

to people. I feel that I write better than most people. I now write

(technically) for a living. I simply didn't want to be tarred with the

brand "BTN" while it consisted of a "staff" of crappy writers, an

editorial group which gives new definition to hands-off management, but

with a more-or-less widespread distribution.

Scott is in the process of instituting long-delayed changes which I

think will be for the better. We shall see how it turns out. However,

just prioritizing BTN higher than a mail packet from interminable "Star

Trek" conferences which key on Important Questions of Our Time, such as

why Data uses contractions when he's not supposed to, will probably go a

long way to making BTN a better periodical.

Or so I thought. In conversation with Scott in the not so distant

past, he implied that the changes I have been hoping for may be a bit

far-reaching at this time. He apparently is keying on such things as

aesthetics as opposed to content at the moment. There are plans to even

improve content over time, by generating a writer's guide, attracting a

"new breed" of writer, as well as soliciting new topics, and more

emphasis on the actual editing process, including getting a proofreader

to look over each issue before it hits the streets and making a

concerted effort to improve the quality of writing that is commonly

available. [Ed.: Just for that, I'm not going to make that sentence any

more readable.]

Well, hope does spring eternal, and maybe, with a little luck, and

perhaps some leadership for a change, we may see writers that are capable

of using such advanced concepts as the indirect object. We shall see

how Scott makes out with his changes. So, for the meantime, it looks

like I am writing here again.

Res ipsa loquitor.

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THE LAST HEGEMONY:

AN INFORMATION AGE COSMOLOGY

Part 3: The Ant Farm Christopher Mohney

################################################################

The author has disappeared;

God and man died a common death.

- Michel Foucault

Probably the most influential force of the last five to ten years

of the Information Age (and that influence shows no signs of

diminishing) is that collection of data exchange networks known as the

Internet. For the purposes of this article, I designate the Internet as

that collection of systems which are essentially free, including but not

limited to academic and government networks and excluding info-

conglomerates like Compuserve and Prodigy. It is somewhat difficult to

nail the Internet down, as (quite rightly) it is more often thought of

as a road than a destination.

Still, what's the big deal? What's so different about Internet that

makes it any different than a big-dog version of the nets and systems

discussed earlier in this essay? The answer: not much. Internet is

much more interesting in its effects on still other, ancillary

Information Age phenomena than as a force in itself. Certainly it

carries great meaning, as it has the best chance of eventually evolving

into a worldwide "centralized" information network. Its lack of clear

boundaries, its polymorphous nature and absorptive tendencies are its

strengths. The appearance of some kind of Internet would seem

inevitable, given the geometrically increasing demand for telelectronic

access.

However, there is a difference. Previously, the systems and system

operators discussed were concerned with information as currency.

Someone clearly benefiting from access could be found at any particular

point where information was stored. But the Internet is not a

repository; it is a network linking repositories together. Who is the

system operator of Internet? Most everyone is, of course. The

governance of Internet is the work of a vast bureaucracy so diaphanous

and convoluted that any kind of centralized power structure is

unthinkable. Each node or collection of nodes is almost a kingdom in

itself, with complete sovereignty and freedom to secede. They are free

to refuse passage to and in most cases alter any information that passes

through their domain. This feudal structure is repeated in an atomic

fashion; a holistic analysis of the Internet will show the feudal model

repeating on almost every level until the sheer, overwhelming, global

number of voices belonging to competing sovereign nodes dissolves into

one colossal blast of binary static. Viewed in this light, the Internet

is a mindless bureaucracy that exists only to perpetuate itself.

Of course, could it be any other way? Once again, humanity is

confronted with technological advances that have far outstripped our

ability to erect new ethnological constructs to contain them. In a

sense, the Internet is becoming the ideal Machiavellian state, endlessly

perpetuating itself mindlessly; yet, a headless State never has to fear

being decapitated, and as its mass is for all purposes indestructible by

virtue of its sheer size, the headless telelectronic State becomes

functionally immortal.

This leads to a questioning of the Internet similar to the question

posed in Part 1. One could write dozens of volumes of what the Internet

*is*, but the question we are asking here is what does the Internet

*mean*? What effect has it had, besides the obvious and well-belabored

benefits of increased access and near-limitless information storage and

retrieval?

Much like the effect of the BBS on the atomic level, the Internet

means that we have to re-examine certain premises that are basic to how

we function as a society. Technology is forcing us to admit, tardily,

that concepts we take for granted as static can be little more than

artificial templates that are poorly suited for much further use. Many

people who might fit the models presented in Part 2 are only too happy

to make use of the Internet, since they may see it as a tool valuable to

whatever ends they pursue. But make no mistake-- nowhere is the idea

of the "user" more ironic than on the Internet. Unbeknownst to most of

the telelectronic feudal lords who "use" it, the Internet by its very

self-perpetuating nature is actually "using" them, and if the Internet

continues its logical evolution it can do no less than completely

annihilate the feudal niches that have become so comfortable for so

many. What keeps a feudal system going is the enforceable idea of

property, and this is no different in the feudal telelectronic

community. As long as information can be gauged and quantified as

property, telelectronic feudalism can survive. It would be foolish to

ignore, however, that the laxity of the regulation of information as

property is almost directly proportional to the growth and perpetuation

of information networks; this should be readily apparent, as the two

factors are related so intimately now that it is difficult to determine

which is actually causing the other. Regardless, as long as one

increases, so will the other. The reasonable end of this double growth

is complete freedom of information coupled with an omnipresent Internet,

either of which leads to the dissolution of the feudal model and the

dislocation of those at home within it.

Society is very nervous about this. Property is the physical

manifestation of capital, which is the basis of our global capitalist

system. Should information become, in an almost Marxist move,

universally distributed (a possibility much more likely than universal

capital) all those who have benefited from the former arrangement will

have their socio-economic rug pulled out from under them. As the idea

of property evaporates, so does the idea of the owner, even the idea of

the author. Consider the complex social construct of the "owner" and

the seemingly endless trouble we have when we try to import this idea

into the Information Age, imprinting ownership or authorship on an

abstraction that by its very nature battles against such an imprinting.

The significance of these possibilities cannot be overstated.

Pandering to economics and philosophies that do not work, retreating

into safe havens for fear of the sure trouble that change brings will

only cause that change to be all the more painful. Even in the most

technologically advanced and well-educated countries on the planet, the

main run of the population has only a fearful and shamanistic

relationship to the technology that is shaping their lives and will

determine the futures of their children. If we expect to reap any

ultimate benefit from this sociological free-play we must be ready to

adapt and adapt quickly, or else suffer the consequences of our stubborn

backward glances.

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"DEAR JAN"

A Glimpse at

The Matrix's "Chat Goddess" Jeff Vaughn

################################################################

In June 1993, a new face appeared on The Matrix by the name of

Jan Murphree. Jan's husband Chris brought home some computers from

his job on occasion, and Jan decided to start tinkering with them. The

computers were the begining of a BBS addict's usual rolling thunder, and

the modem set things into full-blown locomotion. Jan had no earthly

idea that it would become somewhat of a homebound career in less than

four months time.

On the 15th of June, Jan logged in under her husband's account and

went "where she had never been before". It wasn't the final frontier,

but it definately qualified as undiscovered country. On the first few

logons, Jan discovered "chat", and probably had no idea this would be

her ticket to being a "SysGoddess" (or demi-SysGoddess in the terms of

those divine ones). In less than a week, she was completely hooked

(indeed, this is an understatment). Jan was calling, chatting, and

writing e-mail like a typical BBS addict. Jan wasn't an online games

devotee like many addicts usually are, but she practically lived in The

Matrix's chat lines.

Around the middle of August, Jan finally broke down and bought a

"ginormous" (my word, not a misspelling) hunk of time on The Matrix.

Jan broke the old check book and bought 250 hours (yes, before the rates

increased), probably another all-time record in The Matrix's history

book. Chatting was in her blood now, and there just wasn't enough time

in her husband's account to feed the chat addiction. I'm sure Chris was

definately relieved to hear about that. Thanks to Jan's charisma and

plain all-around fun attitude (no need for any butt-kissing, we're buds

already), she made a ton of friends in a very short time, Rocky Rawlins

and Tom Egan being among the large group. The group is still steadily

growing.

It seems that Jan made a lasting impression on our two local

SysGods because Tom suggested that she become a sysop a few months

later. "Dear Jan's" chat line (channel 7) was implemented on October

1 of this year. Being a person who frequently chats with Jan, I can

say it was a definately a hit. Sometimes I had to wait in line to get a

word in edgewise. I finally decided to sit on another channel and talk

with my usual group of individuals while swapping private messages with

Jan until the crowd died down. It was a long wait, sometimes it was 2

a.m. before Jan dropped in.

On October 15th of this year, Jan became a full-fledged sysop. She

was decreed the "Chat Sysop", but a sysop nonetheless, and in record

time for any sysop on The Matrix. Jan also got a few extras on the job.

Her initial job was to oversee the chat lines and invoke her divine

wisdom when and wherever required. (She's gonna get me for that.)

Along the way, Jan picked up a few more responsibilities. She became

Matrix's official "welcome wagon", and the voice validator for the new

users. There was something in there about a woman being better for the

job and I decided not to question it since she was doing such an

incredible job. Jan's batting average on the Matrix definately spoke

for itself as far as qualifications went.

Two days later, Jan struck again. Even though her work load was

enourmous with all the back-logged call verification, a lightbulb

popped on in her head, and she came up with another idea, the BBS

Addicts conference (#17). Even with the small group the conference

started out with, the messages began flowing in. Some ideas for the

conference are still up in the air, and Jan's always looking for new

addicts. The general idea behind the conference was for a group of

people who loved the modem to get together and just chew the fat (or

whatever BBS addicts chew on).

As we all know, curiosity sometimes gets the better of us, so Jan

decided to work up an annual event for all the BBS addicts where they

can all get together and meet. Right now, it's being held every six

months, but I have the feeling that this might become an even more

frequent event than even Jan knows. Only time will tell. The first one

is being held at Ryan's on the 14th of November, but depending on when

this issue of BTN gets out, the expression might be "was held on the

14th of November". Jan and I generally work these things out and it

will be rotated to different areas (just to be fair) for the BBS

addicts who are "way out".

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GAMES

CHILDREN

PLAY Damion Furi

################################################################

I was sitting there minding my own business, smoking a cigarette

after dinner, watching CNN Headline News. The world, CNN assures me,

is falling apart on schedule, President Clinton leading the way.

The kids were outside playing, and Virginia and I were discussing

Bob Dole and the possibility that Congress will pass an amendment to

require the President to get congressional approval before making any

military moves. We agreed with each other that any such amendment would

de-ball whatever power remains to the Executive office.

And, as usual, the kids were popping in, making noise, getting

chewed out for it and hastily leaving again. The news was of no

interest to them.

At one point, however, Brenda came in complaining about grass in her

hair. Virginia asked her what she had been doing.

"Playing 'Drive-By,'" Brenda replied, with 11-year-old glee.

Virginia and I just glanced at each other, and I could see Virginia

repress a shudder.

"What is that?" Virginia asked carefully, her voice carefully devoid

of any particular emphasis.

"Well, you know what a drive-by is, Mom," Brenda said, grinning.

"Somebody in a car drives by and shoots somebody. We were, um, doing

cartwheels and, um, rolling in the grass and practicing our, um, death

scenes."

Poor kid.

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LIFE ON THE LINES

Bernie Starchaser

################################################################

Greetings to all! Yes, I have decided to revive Life On The Lines,

a look at BBSing today from the point of view of an old hand who

remembers what it was like when 300 BPS was not just a good idea, it was

the *law*!

As I have thought about what I might discuss in this revival, a

nagging little item has been bouncing around my head, so I decided to

just go with it. Here goes...

BBS ETIQUETTE, OR THE LACK THEREOF

All right, I think it's safe to assume that most people who have

sense enough to buy a computer, install a modem, get their COMM software

configured, find a BBS number, get logged on and read and post messages

would have to be fairly intelligent. That established, why oh why do I

keep seeing a complete lack of social graces in the conferences? I'm

not talking about the little wisecracks you see with an emoticon by

them, those are obviously tongue-in-cheek. I'm talking about people

simply spouting off at the keyboard with no consideration for the rights

or feelings of whomever may read their drivel. THIS HAS GOT TO STOP!

Look folks, I'll be the first to admit that the guilty parties do

not by any means represent a majority, or even a small minority, of BBS

users as a whole. Indeed, they probably aren't more than the bottom one

percent of the bottom one percent, but they still stick out like a sore

thumb and do nothing *whatsoever* to enhance the image of BBS's or

BBS'ers in the eyes of the common people. People *do* tend to remember

the worst parts of an experience longer than any other aspect. What

sort of image are we sending out?

The sort of thing I'm talking about usually takes the form of some

individual who is convinced of their own intellectual/moral/political

superiority, who belittles and degrades those who do not agree with him

or her unmercifully, without bothering to back up their own positions

with logic or reason. Ladies and gentlemen, intelligent people do not

need to resort to name-calling to make their points, just in case you

hadn't heard. Also, it may not have occurred to you that your own

positions would carry a *lot* more weight if you backed them up with

logic, rather than simply demeaning those who don't see it your way.

I don't believe you'd talk that way in a face-to-face meeting. As

I said, most of us are obviously intelligent beings. We recognize and

observe certain rules of social behavior when we gather. So what's a

BBS besides the biggest gathering place in town? Why can't those same

rules apply to the boards?

I know I'm carrying on a bit, but I'm really incensed about this,

and maybe a little disappointed. And I want to reiterate that I am not

broadcasting this to the general BBS populace. The guilty parties know

who they are, as do most of us. I'm not going to name names or

conferences. I merely want to put out a general call to all: please

exercise the same sort of decorum on a BBS as you would when you were a

guest in home. And for those who cannot find it in themselves to do

this simple thing, all the rest of us should just ignore these boorish

malcontents and enjoy ourselves in spite of them.

I've said enough.

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CAFE SPOTLIGHT:

G.G.'s In The Park David Moss

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G.G.'s In The Park

3625 8th Ave. So.

254-3506 -- 254-9052

Seafood, Steak & Lobster

Your Host: Frank Brocato

G.G.'s has got to be one of my all time favorite places to eat.

You can count on the food being very good, and the service is the same.

For a period of time, G.G.'s was owned and operated by someone other

than the original owners. Now back in the hands of the original owners,

the food, portions, and service are back to where they used to be.

One of the first things you'll see when entering GG's is a tank of

live Maine lobsters. It is these lobsters that GG's has become famous

for. While other restaurants attempt to reduce overhead by offering

Florida lobsters, GG's continues a long tradition of offering the

freshest live Maine lobster. Make no mistake, there is a difference.

The Maine lobster, having spent its life in the cold waters off New

England, has a much better taste than Florida lobsters do. There is a

vast difference in price too. The menu at GG's has "Market" in the

price column for the lobster, so be sure and ask the price before you

order.

The appetizers on the menu are the best selection you'll find

anywhere, from escargot to fried apple wedges with cinnamon and ice

cream. Although not on the appetizers menu, I selected a cup of seafood

gumbo ($2.95). The gumbo is good, but not as good as what I've had in

the past.

For the main course I chose fried, large gulf shrimp ($12.95).

These are undoubtedly the best shrimp I have tried anywhere. They

are jumbo select shrimp, which means simply that they are so large

that they have to be split down the middle and then battered and fried.

The shrimp dinner can also be ordered broiled.

All seafood dinners come served with French onion soup, farm fresh

combination salad, baked potato, and fresh homemade yeast rolls. These

rolls rank as the best anywhere. And the French onion soup? I guess

you have to be a fan of onion soup, which I'm not, so I won't offer an

opinion on it. I will say that since it does come with the meal, I did

sample it.

For beverages, GG's offers all the soft drinks you'd find elsewhere.

You can also order your favorite cocktail from your waiter/waitress.

GG's has one of the finest wine lists available in this city. This is

no joke. I have seen wine lists from several restaurants in this city,

and none compare to GG's. From $5.95 for a half carafe, to $160.00 a

bottle, you'll not find a finer wine list anywhere.

If you arrive at a crowded time, you may wish to relax in the bar.

You can order your favorite beverage, or merely watch the current

sporting event on television while waiting for a table. It may be a

good idea to call for reservations if you plan to dine on a weekend

where there is a game at Legion Field. GG's usually fills up rather

quickly after a game.

Don't forget your dessert (if you still have room). Known for their

homemade Black Bottom Pie, made with real whipped cream, GG's serves a

mouth watering list of desserts. The pies are all $2.95 a slice. So

take some time to indulge yourself in a very good piece of pie.

With all of the items on the menu, GG's may be considered a little

pricy. GG's may not be for the every-night diner. But it is certainly

a restaurant for that special occasion. If you need a restaurant for an

important business meeting, a very special date, or one that will simply

offer you a wide array of good food, then GG's will fit the occasion.

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LOCAL MUSIC

IN DECEMBER Judy Ranelli

################################################################

Wednesday December 1

X at The Nick

Well, they cancelled. I just wanted to include that fact. And,

since I suspect it would have been an embarassing show, I'm kinda

relieved. After Nirvana/Breeders tonight, I'm sure I would have just

rolled over there and blown alot of money, because I have great love and

respect for older X material, but there's no way I'd get much more for

my money than to touch Exene's hem and wish Billy Zoom were around.

John Doe's no slacker either, neither D.J. Bonebrake, but I think

Exene's solo work is better than X's current slush.

Friday December 3

24TH CENTURY QUAKERS at The Nick

Reminds me of the old days trying to sound different and complex,

yet somehow supple and yielding. Not exactly with these guys; they are

rough, and sometimes beautiful, and the longer they stick around, the

better they'll gel. Auditory ride in the industrial clothes dryers at

the diaper service.

Sunday December 5

DADDIES at Smokey Joe Cafe

My oldest brother's band playing Paul Revere and the Raiders, the

Animals, etc... and a bit of blatant nepotism from me but, hell, if you

like this kind of music you should know it's available. Besides,

everything else playing on this night is flaccid and familiar.

Tuesday December 7

Battle of the Bands at Zydeco

Well, Mr Bubble made it, cool, but so did the Autumn Lords, yawn,

but you get seven bands for your entertainment dollar, and you can watch

their friends and relatives vote.

Wednesday December 8

GARGOYLES/WHITE COLLAR CONSERVATIVES at The Nick

Gargolyes are weird Boykin family reunion tunes and WCC are

hardcorish young future leaders with a kickass drummer on a little

Gretch kit, if I remember correctly.

Thursday December 9

Battle of the Bands at Louie Louie

What is this? The Ticks battle not, we're too cool for that, but

I'm not too cool to avoid seeing what's up, especially since I don't

know what bands are in the competition. Imagine feeling like "The Best

Band in Birmingham" award meant something.

Friday December 10

CACTUS PIE/SHAME IDOLS/MOTHER'S DAY OUT at The Nick

Shake those pounds away and smell the atmosphere of a Shame Idols

show with two gambles (don't know how they sound) to sweeten the pot.

Saturday December 11

Lots of stuff:

TOPPER PRICE weaving his way through legendary

lusty ad executives with a shot of whiskey and a harmonica down at the

22nd St Jazz Cafe, doubtlessly damaging the foundations of the tiny club

with the sound and the smoke...

Then over to The Nick for another three

band thing (becoming the norm? I hope not) of unknown music (never heard

SEA OF RAINS/VIOLENT SKY/MARILYN'S NEIGHBORS)...

Or drunk driving to Tuscaloosa for frat nightmare DASH RIP ROCK, or

go to the movies and fall asleep instead.

Sunday December 12

JAMES HALL BAND at The Nick

Not my exact cup of tea but if you want to see other leather jackets

like yours and mine and get a loud heavy show, go on down there, man.

Monday December 13

Toys for Tots Benefit at Louie Louie

THE TICKS may put their names in the hat, from which players are

drawn randomly to play ad lib covers for charity. I'm working till

midnight, but we are trying to see if I can come down afterward and play

"Rock and Roll Sewer" or some such song or two. I think one should

bring a toy donation to enter, but there may be a cover as well.

Wednesday December 15

SPACE CAMP at Oasis

I still think this is one of the cooler bands to hear because the

songs are so good. Oasis is a nice cubby hole to hear them in; they

have an outside deck area if it's not too cold, and the players can hear

your requests without your bellowing them.

Friday December 17

FIVE EIGHT/AUTUMN LORDS at The Nick

Five Eight is fun to dance to especially if you're grumpy, which I

always am, and I think you should know that the Autumn Lords, with Chris

the Lush King (my friend), have made the embarassing error of taking

stage names. I don't know all of them, but the bassist actually calls

himself Bobby Dilautid and poor Chris, well, that's something like "DJ

StarShaker" to you bub.

Saturday December 18

PAUL WESTERBURG in Atlanta (don't know club name)

He's my man, if he can't do it, no one can! Probably a great show,

though I may remain in town for a friend's party, and no, you can't come

but you can go see SHALLOW at the Nick; they're darnright nice, and even

if I liked their earlier incarnation, Volume, better, I can get a nice

head buzz from that guitar blitz static.

Buy Christmas gifts for the next few days, then:

Wednesday December 22

SHAME IDOLS/CACTUS PIE at The Nick

What's left of my hearing, I try to donate to good shows, so I'll

give a little slice of high end to this night.

Friday December 24

BIG DIXIE at The Nick

I heckled them, so they call me some unpleasant names, but they're

just fine and dandy nonetheless. Even if they cover "Sugar Shack", they

also cover "Sukiyaki".

Saturday December 25

I'll be at the Nick playing and having a Christmas party thing

going. Other options include recovering from salmonella in your

Grandma's cooking or watching those Macy's Thanksgiving Parade tapes.

Merry Christmas, by the way.

Sunday December 26

PRIMITONS at The Nick

Ah, those were the days! I fully recommend tryng to catch these

songs, some of which I miss, from the pre-drag-show Mots-Roden-is-a-

songwriter era. I just hope they practice and this isn't a throw-

together, because the songs are so good they deserve it.

That's it; you're just going to have to make these decisions for

yourself for the rest of December. I'm taking a Christmas vacation from

this responsibility.

A few comments, though. Seeing reunions of old bands become more

frequent, or in the case of the Ho-Ho Men, become permanent, is not a

good thing. Why? Becuase after just noticing that even the deadhead

$1.07 Band is doing a reunion, I think it's time these guys did new

things. Newer, better, different. Primitons once is a Christmas

present. Back to 1988 is a standstill. I'm waiting, and watching for

the eventual outcome of this trend. One things for damn sure: ain't

gonna be no VBS comeback tour!

Shonen Knife is performing on the 3rd in New Orleans with Nirvana,

and I almost opted to go, but I just might have gotten stuck there a

whole weekend with no way to attend the BTN party, and that would have

made Mark too happy. I am getting a shirt out of it, if my friends

decide to be a bit more reliable.

Louie Louie is under new management. I heard murmurs that it's

connected to the Ivory Tusk, and hopefully it will continue to book live

entertainment. The Rocking Horse got busted for male strippers without

a licence... And I'm putting a new Seymour Duncan in the SG.

Happy Holidays!

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################################################################

NOTES FROM

THE TRENCHES:

What the Hell is Going On? Dean Costello

################################################################

I came home from work this evening, which is not all that unusual.

I am vaguely tired and vaguely hungry and vaguely bored, trying to

determine what to do for the rest of the night (the lack of real

emotions has been vaguely disturbing me over the last couple of months,

but that's not for this forum). Choices are probably the same as the

last couple of years : read a magazine or journal while dinner is

cooking, maybe play a computer game or two while watching "Roseanne",

watch some more television until approximately 9 or 9:30, undress, hang

up pants and tie from work, take a shower while listening to a comedy

tape (tonight looks like Bill Cosby), read a bit, then go to sleep at or

around 11:00. The joy of adult life.

Tonight commemorates my ninth straight spaghetti dinner. Tonight

also commemorates that fact that I have crossed the $33,000 mark (gross)

for the year. Note the dichotomy between those two statements. I know

I have.

Let us examine this ugly circumstance, shall we? On a bi-weekly

basis, I net approximately $880 (more or less). Six percent of my pre-

tax wage goes immediately into a 401K plan. Something like $30/

paycheck is used to pay for my dental plan. $20/paycheck is automat-

ically deposited into a savings account I have with the credit union

(there is about $400 in the account, paying about four percent). The

end result is about $850 per paycheck.

Let us assume that I am going to gross about $40,000 this year when

all is said and done. (I think that will be pretty close.) That means

that after taxes, et al (as discussed above) are removed, I will net

about $25,000.

"Ahhh," you say, "that's a lot of money. What the hell do you spend

it all on?" Good question. Let's take a look.

Item Cost/year

1-Apartment 9600

2-Student Loans 4800

3-Credit Card 2400

4-Telephone 2400

5-Car Stuff 1800

6-Car Insurance 800

7-Cable 600

8-Electric 500

-----

Total 22900

Comments:

1-Yes, my apartment is a bit pricey. This is the cost of living in

the Nation's Capital.

2-I have to pay at least $400/month for my student loans. God

bless Reagan for cutting student grants. People ask me why I

cannot contribute to the economy by buying a big thing like a car.

I wonder why...

3-For my foolishness of working for an oil refinery, I was given a

Mastercard with a $16,000 credit limit. For my sins, I was

accepted to graduate school. For my silliness, I burned through a

lot of credit. I am paying about $200/month to retire that debt.

4-My phone bill is not outrageous, about $200/month. It depends on

whether I am on the road or at home. When I am on the road, I

have to use the phone card, when I'm at home, I dial direct.

5-I think I am being conservative on the car stuff. I am assuming about

$60/month for gasoline, the occasional tune-up and oil change, as well

as one or two major repairs/year (say, $250 or more).

6-What can I say? When I had a Ford Probe as a rental car, I got busted

for speeding three times in two weeks. Alas...

7-Cable is about $50/month. This includes the basic service of 122

channels, as well as two channels of Cinemax (the double Cinemax doesn't

cost any more than a single Cinemax).

8-I simply don't use much electricity. During the summer months, I burn

a lot of fossil fuels since I like the apartment at about 65 degrees at

night ($75). During the winter, I don't fool with heat at all, so its

pretty cheap ($20).

Okay, that leaves approximately $2000 to spend how I will. What to

buy, what to buy. Well, just to be cool, maybe I'll eat. Let's assume

that I spend a total of $50/week total for food (lunch and dinner).

That implies a total of $2500-ish for food. Now, since I only have

$2000, that can't be right, and it isn't. I am out in the field for

approximately three to five months of the year. That means that my food

cost can be cut approximately in half, which means that my true food

cost is about $1250. Lovely. That leaves me a total of $750.

$750. Hmmm. With $750 I go on two vacations per year, I have to

buy presents and such for relatives, go to movies, drink, get magazine

subscriptions, have fun, travel around here for no good reason, buy

software, buy hardware--hell, buy anything.

Tricky business, this.

From what I can tell, the circumstance that I describe is not all

that uncommon. A lot of people of my age bracket describe very

similar circumstances. There are about five people at the office who

are approximately in my same demographic. One friend is paying

off a two bedroom condo mortgage of $109,000. Another person

built a house with her husband, who works as a land-raper turning

mountainsides into golf course/condo complexes (to be fair, this

is an economic outlyer). A third person is splitting a townhouse

with three other people that, surprisingly enough, do the exact

same thing that he does. I live in an apartment by myself.

Somewhere between 50 and 75% of us are living from one paycheck to

the next. Two of the five of us have to return to parents every

so often, on bent knee, to make ends meet.

I was talking with supply-side economist Cecilia Masson whom I asked

about this strange circumstance of the poverty-striken upper-middle

class. "Well, there are probably a couple of reasons. The one that

best comes to mind is that during the early '80s, Ronald Reagan cut

college grants to students. The students were then forced or cajoled

to take student loans which were not conceived as being a real debt to

the student at the time. Now, look at the interest rates on the 'great

deals' that were being handed out to the students." (My student loan

rates are five, nine and twelve percent.) "You can get a car loan with

a lower interest rate these days." Between that, and a soft employment

picture, the circumstance seems somewhat biased against the Best and the

Brightest.

I'm sure that there are other reasons for my plight. If I didn't

live in D.C., I imagine that the cost of living would be somewhat lower.

I assume that I could always get a better job, maybe in a different

region, which I am trying to do right now. I don't think that my

spending is outrageous, but I could reasonably cut back my telephone to

$100/month, which would free up about a thousand or so, which would in

turn be plowed directly into reducing my personal student debt. I

think, though, that the basic problem is that I came out of school into

a very bad economic situation, and now I am paying the price. Its not

as if I live an extravagant lifestyle. If I did, I can live with this

high-income poverty. But like I said, I have a nice apartment; not

wonderful, just nice. I have fairly good stereo equipment, but I bought

that two years ago. I don't "party", I don't drink, I don't buy silly

things. I would go almost so far as to say that it is a spartan

existence here. When I go on vacation I don't get carried away; I buy

some items for friends of mine to make up for a debt from grad school.

But it isn't as if I have an apartment full of dopey shit that I bought

because I thought it was "cute".

So, right now I am sitting here typing this screed out on a seven-

year-old computer, watching cable on a 19" television, slowly digesting

yet another spaghetti dinner. Hell, it ain't even real spaghetti. It

is a bag-o-spag ($2.50/5-pound bag), using a sauce with 1/3 stick of

butter and 1/3 can of sauce), knowing full well that I am not being paid

until next Friday and things aren't going to be getting much better in

the near future since I have already spent my next paycheck paying off

these student loans, and I can't help but think that something is

fundamentally wrong.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

################################################################

BTN PROFILE

This Month: Bernie Starchaser The Bishop

################################################################

The ProFile is a light-hearted attempt at allowing the BBS community

to get to know the selected user or sysop better. The harassees...er...

candidates for the ProFile are selected purely by random (or maybe not--

read up on "chaos"). If anyone has any suggestions for questions to be

included in the ProFile, or for users to be harassed by the ProFile, then

feel free to E-Mail them to me (THE BISHOP on the Crunchy Frog, or AARON

DEES on most other boards in town).

------------------------------------------------------------------------

ProFile: Bernie Starchaser

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Age: 27

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Birthplace: Birmingham, AL

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Occupation: Sales

------------------------------------------------------------------------

My hobbies include:

Computing (BIG SURPRISE), Model Railroading, writing, collecting

CD's, others too personal to mention

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Years telecomputing: 11

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sysop, past/present/future of:

ORION (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, *and* 7, you'd think I would've gotten the

hint!)

------------------------------------------------------------------------

System(s)/Conference(s) frequented:

Matrix, 8250, Alter Ego mains, Frog Main, Argument, BTNWA

------------------------------------------------------------------------

My oddest habit is:

That would have to be a tossup between singing while driving and

pretending my car is equipped with assorted weaponry whenever other

drivers do mind-bogglingly stupid things (well, that *is* odd,

isn't it?)

------------------------------------------------------------------------

My greatest unfulfilled ambition is:

I have several: 1. becoming obscenely rich, 2. Being a nationally

known BBS personality, 3. getting my wife to use BBS systems,

4. teaching my parakeet to pick good stocks/horses/dogs/football

teams/etc.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

The accomplishment of which I am most proud is:

Having the good sense to stop trying to run a BBS on a Commodore

64!!! Also actually meeting Mark Maisel in person <G>

------------------------------------------------------------------------

My favorite performers are:

Music: RUSH; Movies: Christopher Walken, Christopher Lambert,

Christopher Lee, Christopher Lloyd (see a pattern here?) and Sean

Connery (GOTCHA!); TV: Leonard Nimoy, Jeremy Brett, Tom Baker,

Peter Davidson, Sylvester McCoy (The Dr. Who connection), Patrick

Stewart, Mark Lenard, others too numerous to list (or too

boring).

------------------------------------------------------------------------

The last good movie I saw was:

Oddly enough, _Aladdin_! Yes, add Robin Williams to the above list.

Also, of course, _Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country_, which

means I guess you'd better add David Warner to the list above, too.

Getting a little out of hand, isn't it? Well, you *did* ask!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------

The last good book I read was:

The last really good book I read was _Prime Directive_, which, not

surprisingly, was a Star Trek novel.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

If they were making a movie of my life, I'd like to see my part

played by:

Christopher Lambert, Christopher Walken, or Robin Williams

------------------------------------------------------------------------

My pet peeves are:

People who mispel words and PEOPLE WHO TYPE IN ALL CAPS!

------------------------------------------------------------------------

When nobody's looking, I like to:

Throw things at them and yell "Reflex Check!" at the last moment.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

################################################################

SPECIAL INTEREST

GROUPS (SIG's)

[COMPUTER RELATED] compiled by Eric Hunt

################################################################

BIPUG Alabama UniForum

Birmingham IBM-PC Users Group Homewood Public Library

UAB Nutrition Science Blg 1st Tuesday

RM 535/541 Shawn Cleary 870-6130

1st Sunday (delayed one week

if meeting is a holiday)

Marty Schulman 967-5883

Birmingham Apple Core

Informal breakfast meeting every Saturday, 9am - 11am

@ Kopper Kettle, lower level Brookwood Village Mall

Formal meeting held second Saturday of each month, location

variable (to be announced at breakfast meetings and in the

user group's newsletter "The PEEL".)

President: Sam Johnston - 322-5379

Vice-Prez: Marie Prater - 822-8135

The SIG listing is being re-verified. If you know of an active

Computer Related user's group, please let me know.

I can be reached via Internet email at

eric.hunt@the-matrix.com or drop me a note directly on The

MATRIX.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

################################################################

KNOWN BBS NUMBERS

FOR THE

BIRMINGHAM AREA

################################################################

Sysops, PLEASE check your listing to make sure everything is

correct, especially the networks. Corrections should be mailed on

the Matrix to either James Minton or Scott Hollifield, or in a Sysop

Comment on Outer Limits.

ADAnet One (Nodes 1-3) 250-0013 1200-2400 PCBoard 14.5

[ez, fi, ad]

ADAnet One (Node 4) 254-6050 2400-14400 USR DS PCBoard 14.5

[ez, fi, ad]

Alcatraz BBS 608-0880 300-9600 VBBS 6.0

[he, vi]

Alter-Ego BBS 925-5099 1200-9600 USR HST PCBoard 14.5

[ez, mn]

Baudville (Nodes 1-7) 995-0013 300-2400 Major BBS 6.12

[none]

Bus System 987-5419 300-2400 PCBoard 14.2

[none]

Byte Me! 979-BYTE! 2400-14400 USR HST WWIV 4.12

[ez, th, al]

Castle, The 841-7618 300-2400 Image 1.2

[none]

Channel 8250 (Node 1) 744-8546 300-14400 USR DS PCBoard 14.5

[ez, un]

Channel 8250 (Node 2) 744-5166 300-14400 USR DS PCBoard 14.5

[ez, un]

Cherry Tree 681-1710 1200-14400 TriBBS 4.01

[wm, ca]

Christian Apologetic 808-0763 1200-14400 V.32bis Wildcat! 3.55

[ez, wi, bc, ru]

Crocodile Country BBS 477-6283 1200-16800 USR DS Searchlight 3.5 *RIP*

[sl]

Crunchy Frog (Node 1) 823-3957 300-14400 USR DS PCBoard 14.5

[ez, mn, lu, ll]

Crunchy Frog (Node 2) 823-3958 300-14400 USR DS PCBoard 14.5

[ez, mn, lu, ll]

Crystal Village 856-3749 1200-2400 VBBS 6.10

[cr, cs, al, ho, co, fn, vi]

Den, The 933-8744 300-9600 USR HST ProLogon/ProDoor

[ez, mn, il]

Digital Publishing 854-1660 300-9600 V.32 Wildcat! 3.01

[pl]

Electro-BBS 491-8402 300-14400 V.32/42 Maximus 2.01

[fi]

Family Smorgas-Board 744-0943 300-2400 PCBoard 14.5

[ez, fi, mj, bc, fa, ic, cf, cd, np, ag, ve, ad]

Final Frontier 838-5634 300-14400 VBBS 6.11 *RIP*

[al, he, re, fn]

Genesis Online(Nodes 1-6) 620-4150 300-14400 V.32bis Major BBS 6.11

[mr]

Guardian, The (Node 1) 425-1951 1200-14400 V.42bis VBBS 6.11

[vi]

Guardian, The (Node 2) 425-1956 1200-14400 V.42bis VBBS 6.11

[vi]

Hardeman's BBS 640-6436 1200-14400 Wildcat! 3.51

[wi, di, bc]

Homewood's Hell Hole 987-7823 2400-14440 V.32bis VBBS 6.10

[he, bi]

Joker's Castle 664-5589 300-14400 USR DS PCBoard 14.5

[ez, mn, un]

KickAxis BBS 733-0253 1200-14400 USR DS VBBS 6.0

[he]

Leaping's Lounge 856-2521 1200-14400 GTPower 17.06

[gt, ez, mn, cc, wm, sc, ab]

Lions Den 969-5733 300-14400 USR DS Wildcat! 3.90

[wi, fi]

Lumby's Palace 520-0041 300-14400 VBBS 6.0

[he]

Magic City 664-9883 300-14400 USR DS Wildcat! 3.55

[cc, di, wm, wi]

Magnolia BBS 854-6407 300-14400 USR HST PCBoard 14.5

[ez, mn]

MATRIX, The (Nodes 1-14) 323-2016 300-2400 PCBoard 15.0 *RIP*

[ez, mn, th, il, in, al, sh, sc, gl, ic, ri, fr]

MATRIX, The (Nodes 20-23) 323-6016 9600-14400 USR DS PCBoard 15.0 *RIP*

[ez, mn, th, il, in, al, sh, sc, gl, ic, ri, fr]

MATRIX, The (Node 25-26) 458-3449 9600-14400 V.32bis PCBoard 15.0 *RIP*

[ez, mn, th, il, in, al, sh, sc, gl, ic, ri, fr]

MetaBoard 854-4814 300-14400 USR DS Opus CBCS 1.73

[fi, ad]

MetroMac BBS (Node 1) 323-6306 1200-14400 V.32bis TeleFinder 3.1

[none]

MetroMac BBS (Node 2) 252-0582 1200-14400 V.32bis TeleFinder 3.1

[none]

Milliways BBS (Node 1) 956-3177 1200-2400 Major BBS 6.11 *RIP*

[none]

Milliways BBS(Nodes 2-6)956-2731 1200-2400 Major BBS 6.11 *RIP*

[none]

Missing Link 853-1257 300-16800 USR DS C-Net Amiga 2.63

[cl, cn]

Neon Moon 477-5894 300-14400 TriBBS 4.0

[dx]

Outer Limits (Node 1) 426-5611 1200-16800 ZyXEL Wildcat! 3.90 *RIP*

[fi, do, ec, er, pn]

Outer Limits (Node 2) 425-5871 1200-16800 ZyXEL Wildcat! 3.90 *RIP*

[fi, do, ec, er, pn]

Outer Limits (Node 3) 426-2939 1200-16800 ZyXEL Wildcat! 3.90 *RIP*

[fi, do, ec, er, pn]

Party Line 856-1336 300-14000 V.32bis TriBBS 4.0

[cc, wm, di]

Penny Arcade 699-4625 300-2400 Running Force! 3.75

[none]

Playground 681-5070 1200-14000 V.32 TriBBS 5.0

[wm, di, al, ez]

Posys BBS 854-5131 300-9600 V.32 PCBoard

[none]

Programmer's Shack 988-4695 1200-9600 HST DS Renegade

[ae, di, ws, fi, it]

Quiet Zone 833-2066 300-2400 ExpressNet

[none]

Safe Harbor (Node 1) 665-4332 300-2400 GTPower 17.06

[gt, ez, mn, il]

Safe Harbor (Node 2) 665-4355 300-14400 USR DS GTPower 17.06

[gt, ez, mn, il]

Sam's Domain 956-2757 1200-14400 VBBS 6.0

[da, he]

Safety BBS 581-2866 300-2400 RBBS-PC 17.4

[none]

Southern Stallion 322-3816 300-16800 ZyXEL PCBoard 15.0

[an, ez, lu, pr, th]

Sperry BBS 853-6144 300-2400 V.32/42b PCBoard 14.5

[none]

ST BBS 836-9311 300-2400 PCBoard 14.2

[ez]

StarBase 12 647-7184 300-2400 TriBBS 4.0

[ez, mn, cc]

The Light 979-0368 300-14400 V.32bis PCBoard 15.0

[ch, nl]

Thy Master's Dungeon 940-2116 300-57600 V.32/42b PCBoard 14.5

[fr]

Torch Song 328-1517 300-9600 V.32 Wildcat 3.6

[pr, se, st, do]

Travelog BBS 491-3898 300-2400 TriBBS

[none]

Weekends BBS 841-8583 2400-16800 USR DS Wildcat! 3.9

[ca]

Willie's DYM (Node 1) 664-9902 300-2400 Oracomm Plus

[or]

Willie's DYM (Node 2) 664-9903 300-2400 Oracomm Plus

[or]

Willie's DYM (Node 3) 664-9895 300-2400 Oracomm Plus

[or]

Willie's DYM (Node 4) 664-9896 300-2400 Oracomm Plus

[or]

Ziggy Unix BBS 991-5696 300-1200 UNaXess

[none]

*RIP* = BBS Software is RIP Graphics capable. You must be using a RIP

compatible term software to view them. RIPTerm or QmodemPro v1.50 are

the only two I know of that support it at this time. RIPTerm is shareware

and can be downloaded from most BBS's. QmodemPro is a commercial product.

The two-letter abbreviations you see on the line below the names of

many of the bbs' in the list signify that they are members of one or

more networks that exchange or echo mail to each other in some organized

fashion.

ad = ADAnet, an international network dedicated to the handicapped

ae = ANet, uncertain at press time

ag = AgapeNet, a national Christian network, multi-topic

al = AlaNet, a local network, multi-topic

an = AnnexNet, an international network, multi-topic

at = AdultNet, a national network, adult-oriented

bc = BCBNet, a local network, religion-oriented

bh = BhamTalk, a local network, multi-topic

bi = BitchNet, uncertain at press time

ca = CafeNet, a local network, restaurant/dining, recipes, etc.

cc = Coast2Coast, a national network, multi-topic

cd = CDN, a national Christian network for file distribution

cf = CFN, a national Christian network, multi-topic

ch = ChristNet, a national Christian network

cl = CLink, uncertain at press time

cn = CNet, multi-topic

co = ComicNet, a local net for comic book readers

cr = CrystalNet, uncertain at press time

cs = ChaosNet, uncertain at press time

cy = Cybernet, uncertain at press time

da = DateNet, uncertain at press time

de = DevNet, an international network for programmers and developers

di = Dixie Net, a regional network, multi-topic geared toward the south

eastern United States

do = DoorNet, a national network for the distribution of BBS doors

ec = EchoNet, an international network, multi-topic

er = ErosNet, an international network, adult oriented, files & messages

ez = EzNet, a local IBM compatible network

fa = FamilyNet, an international network, multi-topic

fi = FidoNet, an international network, multi-topic

fn = FrontierNet, a local network, multi-topic

fr = FredNet, a regional network, political discussion

ga = GameNet, a local network, uncertain at press time

gl = GlobalLink, an international network, multi-topic

gt = GTNet, an international network, multi-topic

he = HellNet, a local network, multi-topic

ho = HobbyNet, a local network for hobbyists

ic = ICDM, an international Christian network, multi-topic

ie = Intelec, a national network, multi-topic

il = ILink, an international network, multi-topic

in = InterNet, an international network, linking businesses,

universities, and bbs', multi-topic

it = ITCNet, uncertain at press time

ll = LlamaNet, a national network, freeform correspondence

lo = LocalNet, uncertain at press time

lu = LuciferNet, an international network, adult oriented

ma = MAXnet, a local network, connecting WWIV and VBBS systems

mj = MJCN, an international network for Messianic Jews

mn = Metronet, an international network which echoes RIME, multi-topic

mr = MajorNet, an international network, multi-topic

nl = NewLife, uncertain at press time

np = NPN, a national network for new parents

or = OraNet, a national E-mail network

pl = PlanoNet, a national network, multi-topic

pn = PoliceNet, an international network, law-enforcement only

pr = PrideNet, a local homosexually oriented network

rf = RF Net, a national network for ham radio users and hobbyists

ri = RIME, an international network, multi-topic

rb = RoboLink, a national network, multi-topic

re = RealityNet, uncertain at press time

rp = RPGnet, a local network for role-playing games

rs = RoseNet, a national network, technically oriented

ru = RushNet, a national network for Rush Limbaugh fans

sc = Science Factor Net, a national network, science and technology

oriented

se = SEC, a regional network, homosexually oriented geared toward the

southeastern United States

sh = Shades N Shadows Net, a national network for role-playing games

sl = SearchlightNet, a national network, multi-topic

sm = SmartNet, a national network, multi-topic

sn = ShadowNet, a national network for role-playing games

st = StudsNet, a national network, homosexually oriented

te = TECHnet, a local network, hardware and utility oriented

th = ThrobNet, an international network, adult oriented

un = U'NI-Net, an international network, multi-topic

ve = VETLink, a national network for military veterans

vi = VirtualNet, an international network, multi-topic

wi = WildNet, a national network, multi-topic

wm = World Message Exchange, an international network, multi-topic

ws = WishNet, uncertain at press time

ww = WWIV-Net, an international network, multi-topic

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Strange Texts

Birmingham Telecommunications News 1993

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